Sunday, August 26, 2007

Faith, forgiveness and Linkin Park

I am my own worst enemy. I am harder on myself than any one person should be. I refuse to forgive myself for even the tiniest insignificant transgressions. I have spent most of my life consumed with guilt. Thus my relationship with God has suffered or never really even been developed. How could I possibly be worthy of his love...of his forgiveness? Six months ago I found a church where I felt comfortable and at peace...but the guilt, my unworthiness continued to hold me back. Today, was different. The music at Westwinds is always amazing and thought provoking. But today it meant more to me than it ever has in the past. It spoke to my biggest fear, what is holding me back from God, what is holding me back in my relationships. It was a song I have played at home 100's of times and love but have never delved into...until today. All I can say is thank God for Linkin Park.

"What I've Done"

In this farewell,
There’s no blood,
There’s no alibi.
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret,
From the truth,
Of a thousand lies.
So let mercy come,
And wash away…
What I’ve Done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I’ve done.
Put to rest,
What you thought of me.
While I clean this slate,
With the hands,
Of uncertainty.
So let mercy come,
And wash away…
What I’ve Done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I’ve done.
For What I’ve Done
I'll start again,
And whatever pain may come.
Today this ends,
I’m forgiving what I’ve done.
I’ll face myself,
To cross out what I’ve become.
Erase myself,
And let go of what I’ve done.
What I’ve done.
Forgiving What I’ve Done.

2 comments:

  1. You DO go to Westwinds! I posted on CLM when you put the link to your blog and I saw some of the Westwinds blogs on your blog. We attend WW, but haven't in awhile... its been a lazy lazy year. We finally found WW just before Porter was born and I fell in love with the church, the vibe, the feeling you get from being there. An the music.. totally moving. My husband is more skeptical and lazy about going to church, and this year we've fallen into a rut of "Oh lets just sleep in this Sunday... or we have so much to do this weekend". I need to get back there... I always feel so much more complete when I've had my weekly dose.

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  2. My husband could care less if he goes or not. It is usually just me and the kids. It's my 1 hour of peace a week!

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