Today my babysitter, who is also an awesome friend took the 3 little ones to church with her and kept them for the afternoon so I could be at the hospital with Amonte. His sperm donor came in the afternoon and stayed for the dressing change so I was able to run home and do a load of laundry before I had to get the terrorists.
We ordered a pizza and noshed on some yummies my good friend and job partner J made for us. Then we finished up Cade's family project and the boys painted some models they have been wanting to do. Of course Peyton left his paint unattended and Her Majesty smeared it all over her new dress and the table. But seriously, the least of my worries.
Right at bed time the phone started ringing. Amonte was calling from the hospital in horrible pain. To make a long story short they had to do an additional dressing change and it was not pretty. They gave him a Vicoden, doubled his dose of Demerol and gave him 2 doses of Ativan before they could get the pain managed. This was the same scenario I was faced with Wednesday night when I only had the option of Vicoden.
I called his dad and told him to get his ass up there ASAP. Of course he took his sweet ass time so Amonte called and so did his nurse. I called him again and he said Amonte told him not to come. He wanted me. I had 2 kids in bed and one on her way to dreamland. Another on the phone bawling. Nobody, not a single person that I could call to help. I sat on the phone and cried with my son. Then I cried till I was sick and sat by the phone waiting for the nurse to call me back.
I have plenty of people who offer to help. But honestly, when the people that should be helpful and supportive are not- how on earth do you ask anyone else? Plus what do I say? Ummm, yeah I haven't had time to clean my toilet in a month, the laundry is piled up to the ceiling, I really need a nap, my dog needs a bath. I mean are you kidding me? Asking for help and being totally ashamed is just not appealing. Asking for help and being told "no" or worse yet ignored is even worse.
But worse yet, Amonte will most likely be discharged from the hospital tomorrow. How the hell will I mange this dressing on oral pain meds? Alone.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Uncle!!!!!!
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OMG, Did you say "sperm donor"??? Are you referring to his father??!! LMAO
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that this is so tough on all of you, you definitely could use more help and some time to take care of yourself too
ReplyDeleteBig Hugs, Zoe. And Amonte, and Peyton, and Cade, and Ava. You are all awesome and doing what families do. Supporting each other. Even when it feels like you're not. My heart to yours.
ReplyDeleteOh hun, I wish there was something I could do. I wish I lived closer. I wish it wasn't happening for you.
ReplyDelete(((hugs)))
Also? there is something on my blog for you.
So sorry that what started out to be a good night ended up so bad! His 'Dad' should have gone no matter what, doesn't sound like he had his hands tied with sleeping toddlers.
ReplyDeleteLina
So sorry, Zoe! I know what it's like to deal with things alone, and it's so hard emotionally on top of everything else. I will be praying that Amonte's homecoming is an easy (pain-free) transition, and you can get back on your feet soon.
ReplyDeleteI'd clean your toilet if I could! :-) And, I'm sorry, but I wouldn't do that for just anyone...lol!
Hugs!!! Hang in there, girl!
You know I would come help you with whatever you need. :)
ReplyDeleteI hope things start to get better. My prayer's are with you.
Like I said, let me know. :) Even if I could make you guys a meal.
oh man! wish there was something I could do. My prayers are with you! Things have to start getting better!
ReplyDeleteOh god you poor thing! BOTH of you! If i was closer, I'd come over and help you. I'm the Queen of Helpers around these parts. ;-) I bitch about it but I do enjoy lending a hand to my friends and family when I know they really need it! And honey it sounds like you need it! :-( Do you have any close friends who would be able to come over and give you a break at home?
ReplyDeleteI wish there was something I could do to help but I guess I'm just stuck saying I'm sending you strenth and HUGS through the blogisphere...
ReplyDeleteWow...I wish I could say or do something to make you feel a little better.
ReplyDeleteI hope things work out for you and you find a friend/family member kind enough to take some of the pressure off you by helping out a little. Even if it's so you can just get a nap in and some laundry done. ;)
Girl, ask for help! There is nothing to be ashamed of. Look at it this way, someday someone will need your help.
ReplyDeleteSounds like daddio needs a good ole' kick in the butt.
If people offer their help, TAKE THEM UP ON IT. If they are your friend, they won't care about the laundry, the ring around the toilet or anything else that you see glaring in your face. I used to babysit my nephew (free of charge) and I knew his parents were so busy that I did their laundry, cleaned their bathrooms and scrubbed the burned on goo from the stove. People who love you do things for you. In 20 years you can pay them back.
ReplyDeleteI really hate asking for help. I hope some people come through for you!
ReplyDeleteZoe, if I was there...I would come over, clean your toilet, do your laundry, wash Norm (probably the least appealing task) ;0), and take care of your kids as long as you needed. But, sadly I'm not there. So, more cyber hugs are being sent your way. You can always call me if you need someone to talk to. And, maybe, if Amonte is well by then...I will take you up on that previous offer to meet you somewhere half-way this summer. I think we both deserve the break. :0)
ReplyDeletezoe,
ReplyDeletemy prayers are with you. i am praying that things improve real fast. try not to worry about the house stuff. just think of yourself and your children.
i am with you in spirit.
Ohh I am so sorry that You and Amonte has to go through this! You guys are still in my prayers. And heck clean toliets are overrated!! :)
ReplyDeleteZoe, I so wish I could help you.
ReplyDeleteHoping today is a better day for Amonte. And for you too. Hang in there. Thinking of you all :)
This is so crappy. I'm sorry you and your family are going through this. Try to keep your chin up, and focus on the important things. Toilets & doggy baths don't need to be worried about right now.
ReplyDeleteThere is no shame in asking for help. Everyone needs help sometimes!
ReplyDeletehoney...
ReplyDeleteplease move closer to me !!!
we could help each other... my bathroom's a mess, i rarely get a shower till midnight (if then. just stand down wind), my laundry looks like crackatoa, and my hubbie works 70+ hours a week.
I know the feeling sooo well about needing simple help, but really uncomfortable about asking (don't want to answer the questions 'well where is the father??)... i wish i had a parental unit that could help.... feel alone in this world somedays.
Reach out the best you can... contact some of your friends and set up a 'what can you do in an emergency'
Oh man, this stinks. I really wish that there was something that I could do for you. I see that I am not alone in that feeling.
ReplyDeleteI sincerely hope that things start to look up sometime soon.
Oh Zoe, I just really hope things get better for you. You are probably just running ragged! I'd offer help, but I'm no where near you and well, I can't even take care of my own two right now! Even if you want to bitch, just send me an email. I'm often in a bitchin' and crabby mood too!
ReplyDeleteOh sweet pea! I know where you're coming from! I wish I could be there to help you!!!! Of course the twins would probably not help much and only make things more chaotic - but really, if I could do anything for you I would. This is nothing to have to face alone. I'm so sorry. Can't the Dr's send you home with something stronger than Vicodin? It does nothing for me - I ask for Oxycodone.
ReplyDelete