Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Autopsy shows Shrek tissue in Man's grey matter

Mark sleeps with this giant, foam, Shrek green ear plugs in. Every night. No matter what. Last night I wanted to take them out of his ears and shove them up his nostrils...really, really far. I contemplated it for nearly an hour. Running through all of the excuses I could feed to my public defender. It would have been justified. You should not be allowed to sleep peacefully while disturbing someone else's already disturbed sleep. I'm reasonably certain there is a law. If it happens tonight I will smother him with a pillow. So help me god I will.


  1. I can't handle the snoring either!!

  2. You don't know how many times I've laid there thinking about smothering my husband with a pillow! It's a fight not to just do it. I can not tolerate snoring! One of us always ends up on the couch lately because it is that unbearable! It's a wonder he doesn't wake up with bruises all up and down him from the kicks he gets all night!

  3. I'll bake you a nail file into a cake! :-)

  4. I didn't smother him...but I kicked him in the ass real hard. Thanks Jessica! Chocolate is my fav!

  5. Did it go a little something like this?
    M: OOF! WTF!

    Z:'OOPS! I'm sorry Mark,let me remove my keecap from your a$$ I didn't realize I hit you so hard! Must have been been that violent dream where I was running from a FRIGGIN CHAINSAW!'

    Right there w/ you! I just give a not-so-subtle kick in the shins :) & roll over quick!


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